So I have discovered that I am no longer able to cry. Like any sad event in my life, or a sad movie I am unable to shed a tear. Movies that I have seen before and cry every time I see them...I can't cry. One day I know I will be able to cry again. But in all honesty I am glad that my emotions have scaled back 2 fold. Wouldn't want to scare the boys now....would I. lol. They can't cope with emotions very well.

So with this Ben fella...I am going to have a conversation with him and tell him what I want from him. Have a "heart to heart" like my horoscope says. I want to pursue something with him..but the street has to run both ways and I tell myself that what I want from him is going to happen...I can't doubt myself. Not now. I am not asking that I give my heart away. Big mistake that would be. All I am asking is that we go into a fun, non-pressure relationship.

What I want right now:

1. Ben and I are in a healthy, non-pressure, non-serious relationship...we are going out.

2. I have 2 friends in each class this semester.

3. My heart does not feel like a ton of bricks, but feels like it is weightless.

There is more but right at this second these 3 things are my goal and they will happen. They are happening.