that was my horoscope for the day and you know what it is totally right. I feel so happy around that person. I could not get him out of my head and now I know what course of action I have to take. I feel like myself around him, I can tell him pretty much anything. I've intrigued him, which made me chuckle....actually o no what have I gotten myself into type deal.....lol.
But hey I learnt some things about him that totally surprised me and made me fall for him even more....He likes my one and only favorite screamo band...."Alexisonfire" I was like omg...yay! It is so easy talking to him and to relate to him. He is a very sweet guy, with no ego in his way, he makes me smile and laugh. I deserve this...I know I deserve him.
So ya I traped myself into him and I playing poker and getting semi-intoxicated...I told him that I am rather honest while under the influence and that my limit is 3 drinks. But I plan to invite him over and cook him dinner on the long weekend...both our folks are gone, so I get the house to myself. Yay. Its going to be fun, we can listen to alexis and talk, make out some...OOooooO, I know eh? it's about time.
I wanna show him a good time, have fun with him. Show him another side of who he lost. Apparently in his last relationship he was rather "whipped." I kinda felt bad. Cause I remember this summer at the cabin, he was up there with his girlfriend, and it didnt seem like he was having so much fun. The cabin is supposed to be fun, you go water skiing and wake-boarding.
I am so smiting. I wanna kiss him sssoooooo bad. Show him my hidden "talents", eventually.
It was rather funny cause we ended up talking about sex....my o my, all my conversations with guys ends up with sex as the final topic. It just made him all the more appealing. I can't wait til this stupid courtship dating stops, there is this barrier of what I know to be sexual tension...it has to be realized at some point.
I was talking to my friend from school, her and I can talk in confidence to each other about our guy problems and it is great. We tell no one else. Our lips stay sealed. But anyways I was talking to her and I told her that I feel like I am back pedaling in a way. That I have this great guy that I am pursuing and want a quality relationship with, but I feel pulled to stall and wait for hook up sex with another. She basically slapped the back of my head and told me I was crazy. The slap really hurt. But I realized that she was right. I knew she was right all along, I just need to talk it out. But really like what was I thinking? I am not putting myself first and that has to be key. So I no longer want to back petal, I am moving forward and finally forgetting about un-named. I feel so much lighter too. I mean, a whole ton of weight has finally lifted from my chest and heart. I have been waiting for this day for months now. I still can't believe that it took that long. It's like finally. I realized that I needed to move on. I really do think as well, kakes and kyle had something to do with me finally achieving this. A great guy came along and thats made a world of difference in my mind. I can finally not look back. I won't either.
Gosh I probably sound like a little girl or something, but I really miss him. Our date last night was so good. I probably rambled a little but thats ok. I think in the next few times we hang and establish our relationship, more will be revealed about each other. I've already told him that, just let me cry for 3 mins when I feel it necessary and that will be that. I can't bottle up emotions....whether they are good or bad, happy or sad.....he just laughed. He kept on laughing to at me....I was like stoppp...he didnt hurt my feelings at all, just was teasing me. I so should of made a move....ahhh....but I was waiting for him to do it....grrr. Apparently it shall be I who does...and I suppose that will be when we have fun at laura's.
O and I am rather disappointed at my Shakespeare Prof...didnt show up to class yesterday....I was so looking forward to seeing 7 versions of Hamlets "to be, or not to be" speech. But apparently todau the email he sent today stated that he got clipped by a car while downtown going to the c-train....hmmmm, he seemed fine to me today when I saw him walking from the train station........*evil eyes*