Wow what another lovely thanksgiving turkey dinner...I do have to come out and say that it was much better me going there than...getting together with a certain some one. I forget that I have good times with my older cuz's. They have all these funny stories to tell and then there's the everytimetimewegettogetherwecan'twaittotakeyououttothebarspeech. Well I just said to them...I will have to pencil you in cuz I already have many dates to the bar to go to...Ya and here is the thing....I don't really wanna go to any bars....or clubs or anything like that...they are so over rated...like come on what is the big deal....I can find many more ways to have fun with my friends with out going to any bar, club, pub....or any other place where it's that atmosphere. But I guess you always wanna try something at least once in your life...so I guess I have to suck it up like a good little girl and pretend to have the time of my life.

Hummmm but I am reading this really great book......its called "What We Do Is Secret" by Thorn Kief Hillsbery. I donno but there is just something in this book that has changed me forever. I think it might have to do with something about living life in "realitly" for a lack of a better word....to live life in a real way.....to see life being as real as you can get it....not living "numbly" through life. Not being numd to your surroundings. Maybe the story just pulls me in this fake world of fiction.....but I have to say that this story probably has many truths and reals in it than any other book I have read. The thing is that once I read a good book like this, I will be wanting to live the book...to experence the things that the characters lived through. And this book was written in a style that I ahve never come across before....its kinda hard sometimes to understand it...but once I mostly got it....it became this most amazing book ever. I have to read his other book..."War Boy."

So I am very proud of my self almost done my wicked rad scarf....black and white...

I am becoming very itchy again...and it's not about some skin problem.... what I mean is I just want someone...like I am not gonna go around and be like oooooooo go out with me or anything....but its like...I just want a guy that I can always count on no matter what....and I really don't think I have gotten one....a good one...I just want to be held close. real close. But I just can't be all boo-who about it...I know it will come eventually...I just have to let fate come into play.